When the hands of the clock struck 3 in the gleaming sun on an appealing day of April, three prankish monkeys decided to flirt with my neighbours, The Dhobi's. I named them Pinku, Naanu and Sonia not because I am quite fond of naming some random monkeys but since these name belonged to the children of my prerogative neighbour.
So all the three primates conspired against my good neighbours and since the Dhobi's lived on the first floor, they were the easy target. There laid a bed in the porch of Dhobi's where a packet of peas was lying. Pinku, Naanu and Sonia drooled over the pack of the peas. So they plotted the captivition of the peas.
Pinku took the charge of the situation and ordered Naanu to hop onto the balcony grill. Naanu quickly followed the order. One thing that was to be noticed that none of my Dhobi neighbour were in the porch, I guess everyone was on a prowl. Anyways, so by this time Pinku and Sonia went upto the pack of peas and opened it very carefully. Suddenly Pinku noticed that I was watching them from my rooftop. I smiled at Pinku and for a moment I felt he smiled back at me. He jumped in joy as if he got my approval to snitch the peas.
I continued to watch their act closely. Once Pinku and Sonia got hold of the peas, they were exuberated and jumped with joy. Naanu derailed from the balcony and ran upto his brother and sister to enjoy their newly succceeded meal. But this wasn't all, Pinku and his siblings had just started to enjoy the cheer of the party. Pinku stood up and moved on to the entrance of the house. He pushed the half bolted door and it opened like the Alibaba's cave door. Quickly Sonia jumped from one railing to the other and covered her brother. Right behind them was Naanu, he moved his two meter tail and swiveled it in the air. Pinku decided to enter Dhobi's house. As he went inside the house and his brother and sister were about to follow him, I heard a scream from inside the house. I knew my neighbours have had a tryst with the Monkeys. The next thing that I witnessed was Pinku (the real one), came out with a broom in his hand and was attacking his family replicas. This was the time when Sonia and Naanu realised that the time has come to leave the place. They quickly hoped on from one grill to the other and in a matter of time all three of them were on the rooftop of the three storeyed building. They walked one behind another feeling proud of their act.
As I was watching them go and smiling at the misery they had caused to the Dhobi's, my eyes struck with Pinku's (the monkey's) and I felt as if he winked at me. I couldn't control myself and I winked back at him.
DISCLAIMER: All characters appearing in this work are NON-FICTITIOUS. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely INTENTIONAL
Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Centerstage Goliyan
“What are you doing Mr. Sharma?”
The piece of chalk took off from Golu’s hand (Golu as we called our mechanical teacher, Mr. Ramsaran Chaturvedi) and hit me right below my right eye. It took the smile off of my face and I felt as if I have been woken up from a profound sleep.
“Sir...” I was bewildered not knowing what to reply him.
“What are you doing?” He enquired again.
“Sir, ..." Taking charge with confidence I continued "...actually I was studying the reponse of my project, which happens to be a curved machine. When it is stimulated by the action of thrust upon it until the liquid that is stored in its chamber is pushed out.I’m trying to limit the force so as to improve its efficiency. It is related to my project, Sir.” I told him.
I was watching porn.
According to Albert Camu,
Absurdity lies in the opposition between the human need for meaning, on the one hand, and the unconcerned and meaningless world, on the other. It certainly didn’t seem absurd.
“Ok, carry on with it then, please.”
“Thank you Sir.” I sat down as my colleagues started to giggle like a 10 year old girl.
“Raghu, Shiva, Akshay all three of you out get out of the class.” Golu ordained.
“But sir…” all three of them spoke in unison.
“A person is trying to learn something, get creative and you three fools laugh at him. It’s pitiful.”
“Sir…” they wanted to explain their misery.
“…not a single word, just get out!!” this time Golu had fierce streak in his eyes
“…This explains the working of a synchronous machine.” Golu continued as he turned around.
The three poor guys didn’t have any option other than to leave the class. All three of them gave me despicable looks. Raghu tried to hit me on my head but I managed to escape.
My friends were paying the cost of my sins. My deadly sin of lust and I totally enjoyed committing that sin. It was real fun and I wish I could do that more often.
When Golu left the class, Raghu, Shiva and Akshay came back inside and jumped upon me like a hungry wolf.
“I defended myself in the best possible manner I could but they still managed to rape me.”
Minutes later, our astro teacher, Kumari Hansa Devi arrived. Her name was Hansa Devi but she had not a single sign of beauty on her face, or for the matter of fact, Body. She was as dark complexioned as a crow and was 5’2” in height, wore a glass that had paint coming off its rim and an old sari, which we considered to have been abandoned by her mother. So we called her Miss Hansa Devi, as we presumed she had already been designated with such a monicker.
She hardly paid any heed to the class. She used to come in the class, say whatever she wanted to say irrespective of the fact whether or not the class is listening to her.
Raghu threw the same piece of chalk that Golu had projected towards me, on Miss Hansa. I looked at him not believing he did that, not because he did this for the first time rather because we had a pact that we won’t disturb Miss Hansa since she already looked disturbed.
Akshay and Shiva giggled at Raghu’s undertaking.
Miss Hansa continued to teach as she did not care.
I was mad at him. I stood up and apologised to Miss Hansa for what Raghu did. Likewise, I was paying the cost of Raghu’s Sin. I think that’s why friends are there, they take each other’s problem as their own and still be together.
When I apologised to Miss Hansa, she looked back at me and said, “You don’t need to apologise for something that you haven’t done. A person has to pay the price of his deeds in the same life, sooner or later.”
I had heard this one before, from many noble minded persons.
“I still apologise for his doing mam, he is stupe to have done such a thing. I kindly ask you to forgive him please.”
“That is not necessarily required. What is of more importance is that at the end of the day. A person realises his mistakes and God shall forgive him.”
It seemed like I have been hit with verbiage of reality. I smiled at Miss Hansa and sat down.
From that day on I had a peculiar respect for Miss Hansa, we didn’t aliased her otherwise I would have stopped calling her whatever we would have. And since that day even Raghu started studying in Miss Hansa’s class.
The piece of chalk took off from Golu’s hand (Golu as we called our mechanical teacher, Mr. Ramsaran Chaturvedi) and hit me right below my right eye. It took the smile off of my face and I felt as if I have been woken up from a profound sleep.
“Sir...” I was bewildered not knowing what to reply him.
“What are you doing?” He enquired again.
“Sir, ..." Taking charge with confidence I continued "...actually I was studying the reponse of my project, which happens to be a curved machine. When it is stimulated by the action of thrust upon it until the liquid that is stored in its chamber is pushed out.I’m trying to limit the force so as to improve its efficiency. It is related to my project, Sir.” I told him.
I was watching porn.
According to Albert Camu,
Absurdity lies in the opposition between the human need for meaning, on the one hand, and the unconcerned and meaningless world, on the other. It certainly didn’t seem absurd.
“Ok, carry on with it then, please.”
“Thank you Sir.” I sat down as my colleagues started to giggle like a 10 year old girl.
“Raghu, Shiva, Akshay all three of you out get out of the class.” Golu ordained.
“But sir…” all three of them spoke in unison.
“A person is trying to learn something, get creative and you three fools laugh at him. It’s pitiful.”
“Sir…” they wanted to explain their misery.
“…not a single word, just get out!!” this time Golu had fierce streak in his eyes
“…This explains the working of a synchronous machine.” Golu continued as he turned around.
The three poor guys didn’t have any option other than to leave the class. All three of them gave me despicable looks. Raghu tried to hit me on my head but I managed to escape.
My friends were paying the cost of my sins. My deadly sin of lust and I totally enjoyed committing that sin. It was real fun and I wish I could do that more often.
When Golu left the class, Raghu, Shiva and Akshay came back inside and jumped upon me like a hungry wolf.
“I defended myself in the best possible manner I could but they still managed to rape me.”
Minutes later, our astro teacher, Kumari Hansa Devi arrived. Her name was Hansa Devi but she had not a single sign of beauty on her face, or for the matter of fact, Body. She was as dark complexioned as a crow and was 5’2” in height, wore a glass that had paint coming off its rim and an old sari, which we considered to have been abandoned by her mother. So we called her Miss Hansa Devi, as we presumed she had already been designated with such a monicker.
She hardly paid any heed to the class. She used to come in the class, say whatever she wanted to say irrespective of the fact whether or not the class is listening to her.
Raghu threw the same piece of chalk that Golu had projected towards me, on Miss Hansa. I looked at him not believing he did that, not because he did this for the first time rather because we had a pact that we won’t disturb Miss Hansa since she already looked disturbed.
Akshay and Shiva giggled at Raghu’s undertaking.
Miss Hansa continued to teach as she did not care.
I was mad at him. I stood up and apologised to Miss Hansa for what Raghu did. Likewise, I was paying the cost of Raghu’s Sin. I think that’s why friends are there, they take each other’s problem as their own and still be together.
When I apologised to Miss Hansa, she looked back at me and said, “You don’t need to apologise for something that you haven’t done. A person has to pay the price of his deeds in the same life, sooner or later.”
I had heard this one before, from many noble minded persons.
“I still apologise for his doing mam, he is stupe to have done such a thing. I kindly ask you to forgive him please.”
“That is not necessarily required. What is of more importance is that at the end of the day. A person realises his mistakes and God shall forgive him.”
It seemed like I have been hit with verbiage of reality. I smiled at Miss Hansa and sat down.
From that day on I had a peculiar respect for Miss Hansa, we didn’t aliased her otherwise I would have stopped calling her whatever we would have. And since that day even Raghu started studying in Miss Hansa’s class.
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